This holiday season, I am thankful for family.
For most of my life, I spent Thanksgiving and Christmas with my folks. Sometimes we would go spend the holiday with other relatives, but the core group of Mom, Dad, and I was a constant. Then, Dad died two years ago and Mom last year.
I have to admit I have felt a little lost since they died. It is a natural part of the grief process. But death, like life, has a funny way of changing the game, sometimes quite subtly.
A month after my Mom died, her brother died. My uncle was one of the good guys, and his death, after what I had already experienced the previous year and a half, was another gut punch.
I wanted to support my two cousins and my aunt, so I traveled to KC for my uncle's funeral. A number of my aunt's family were also there to support her and the girls. They were back again, eight months later, for my aunt's funeral.
We didn't know each other well, but we knew names and the basics about each other, enough that there were hugs all around as people left to return home.
Thanksgiving and Christmas of 2024 I spent with longtime family friends who, essentially, were chosen family. We had known each other since I was five years old. It was a good time and I did my best to not tear up while missing my folks during those two holidays.
Then, this past summer, I returned to KC, partly for my birthday celebration, but also to look through family treasures as my cousins prepared to clean out my aunt and uncle's house.
I hadn't been there long before my older cousin (she's only about four months older than me, but older is older) said she had news. Her mother's side of the family was gathering for Thanksgiving at Grand Lake of the Cherokees in Oklahoma and they were inviting me to join them.
Now those who know me well know that I am a dyed-in-the-wool introvert and I sometimes don't do well in large, boisterous crowds. At that point, I didn't have plans and I knew it would be good for me to be around a group of good people, so I said I would be happy to join them.
A while later, I began to second guess myself. Had I made the correct decision? They all have known each other well for years. I did not.
Nonetheless I continued forward and vowed to try to fit in and at least not embarrass my cousins.
Then, as Thanksgiving drew closer, I began to worry about traveling all that way by myself. My years as a journalist writing cops stories has colored my view of the world. I still believe there are many good people in the world, but I know there are some who are not and I was concerned about driving through an area with which I am not familiar.
As it turned out, I ended up driving to KC and traveling to the lake with my cousin and her husband. I much appreciate them letting me tag along!
There were times where I hung out on the fringes of the group and observed. Afterall, I am a retired journalist. We had four generations there. There were people from a variety of locations and careers. Everyone's story was a little different, but they all had two things in common: their family and the importance of it.
Despite my introvertedness the four days we were at the lake, the Brown family drew me out and included me. In fact, they have adopted me and I am one of the family now!
That's something for which I am greatly thankful!
